These past two weeks has been a whirlwind of all things Italy. I’ve been talking with some people about my book, I’ve had WRITER’S BLOCK AGAIN but it’s okay because i’m hopeful that I can overcome it with some wine and maybe a mini vacation. I was lucky enough to do an interview with very sweet and brilliant italian filmmakers where we discussed fascism, the emigration of Italian youth, gender inequality,homosexuality, and religion (and nobody yelled at me! Hooray!) I did an interview for a tour guide that is coming soon, and another interview with a lovely fellow blogger. PLUS! I got to have this conversation with my in-laws:
Me: Hi! How are you guys?
MIL: GOOD! How are you? What did you eat today?
FIL: You ate shit!
MIL: SHUT UP! What did you eat today?
FIL: THEY ATE SHIT!
MIL: SHUT UP!
ME: Okay, Okay. Yes, we ate shit. Yes. So, anyways, what have you been doing?
MIL: Nothing. The same. What have you been doing?
FIL: What HAVE YOU NOT BEEN DOING!? When are you going to make a baby! MAMMA MIA! THIS IS TAKING FOREVER! I’ll be dead before you two have a child! WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING OVER THERE!?
MIL: MAKE A BABY! MAKE THE LOVE! MAKE THE LOVE!
FIL: DO SOMETHING!
ME: Uhm, yeah, we’re uhm, busy with work and stuff.
MIL: TOO BUSY!? HAHAHAH!
FIL: TOO BUSY!? HAHAHAHA.
Both together: MAMMA MIA! OH DIO!
Francesco (blushing and getting all embarrassed because sex is naughty and he was raised catholic): Okay, okay, well nice talking to you guys. We have to go…
MIL: A BABY!
Me: Okay, great, bye guys. Have a good day.
MIL & FIL: Oh, okay, Ciao!
Me: Vi voglio bene
FIL: Oh! Uhm, uh, uh, me too!
Me: Okay bye.
We hang up and look at each other. Shrug, and go back to what we were doing.
WHERE I AM WHEN I’M NOT HERE (Or NOT BEING SCREAMED AT TO MAKE MORE SEX)
I Was Interviewed For A Tourism Book. An Excerpt Can Be Found at The Ramble by Gigi Grffis Here