humor

1. “I’m an airplane, brrrrrrr, I’m an airplane, brrrrr! I want to be a pigeon so I can shit on people!”-I don’t remember this but apparently it happened after a little too much mojito last week. 2. F: Misty, WHY…

Watching The Walking Dead With Francesco. Me: “What would you do if I turned into a zombie?” F: “I would put you in a room and feed you other humans.”True love, my friends. The Walking Dead:He Loves me, He loves me A…

So this is a really long post and I am sorry but I’ve been swamped so I’m going to cram everything into one giant update. What you should do is just read it in parts. It’s not that long if you…

My apartment is located outside of the center in a little gated community near Campo Di Marte. We moved here because it’s “nice and quiet.” Bullshit! We’re sandwiched right between crazy and some opera-singing-asshole upstairs. Our landlord downstairs is going…

It’s not that I’m entirely anti-social, it’s more like I intensely dislike and refuse to participate in small-talk for any extended period of time. The weather is great, we both have jobs, how fun that you too completed college, please,…

Me: Honestly I’m not sure I want kids because what if one night I wake up and one of them is standing in the doorway all backlit and I have to wonder if it’s a zombie or not. Because in…

Last weekend Francesco and I went downtown to have a drink with his friends. Of course we had to bring Oliver with us which is usually annoying. This time, however, I found a way to entertain myself with him. Sometimes…

My mother told me that the first time I tried to run away I was nine months old. How can a baby run away at nine months old you might ask? Apparently I was like one of those babies in horror movies. The creepy ones that walk and talk and then attack someones face.