ME. “If we go to Thailand I get a butler, my own butler, it’s ethical and I would tip them a lot because I’m nice but I get a butler and it says they make you coffee in the morning and draw the drapes, so basically I can be like that ugly girl from Annie. And the butler will do “anything” according to the website so she can read me books and help me plan trips and I can name her butterfly!”
Fra. “You can’t name them.”
ME. “Who fucking says!? I can name her buttlerfly. Butterfly, please make some coffee. Butterfly, does this skirt make me look fat? It’s going to be the best time! We’re going to Thailand!”